Sibling-to-Sibling Support Day

It seems fitting, with yesterday being National Sibling Day, that today be Sibling-to-Sibling Support Day. Being the sibling of a newborn who is in the NICU is scary, lonely and often times boring.

Parents are with their infants for hours on end in the hospital, and the other children, who are not yet old enough to go to school or are having to stay with their parents for various reasons, are left to have to entertain themselves. Being a former sibling of a child in the NICU, I can most certainly relate.

The hospital my sister was at did not have a program like the NICU Family Support Program at UAB, but they did have nurses who were kind enough to think about myself and my other sister. They would try to keep us entertained with books and other items while my parents were visiting Caroline Grace.

So, today I am collecting those items that could help keep siblings entertained, whether it is a coloring book, a reading book, crayons, markers, toys, or other items, it will all be appreciated by the parents who can rest easy knowing that each of their children is being tended to.

If you feel lead to donate, please contact me using the contact information located on the flyer.

The meaning of it all...

I have been going on and on for the past week and a half about what I am collecting, what it is for, how much it will help, yadda, yadda, yadda...but what does it really mean? Why is some 23-year-old so concerned with it all?

It has been a while since I told my story, my family's story.  It was 1998 when my parents told me that I would be a big sister...again! I already had one little sister, and to be quite honest, when she was 3 and I was 8, we DID NOT get along. I can say this now because we are best friends, but we both admit that there was true dislike there for a few years. So, when my parents told me that we were adding another one to the mix, I just prayed it was going to be a little brother who I could get along with, but it turns out we had a lot more that we needed to be praying for.

Around that time my dad had accepted another job, and had to uproot his Birmingham-born-and-raised family. Starting a new job meant not having him home quite as often and that was incredibly hard for this daddy's girl, but what I was unaware of was how hard it was on my mom.

My mom - pregnant with a third child, caring for two, spirited, argumentative little girls already and having to figure out our new life in Jackson, MS., which, though it was a mere four hours from Birmingham, seemed like light years.  She was also feeling sick with what we now know was so much more than the typical nausea that accompanies pregnancy. She had developed toxemia, and to make matters worse her concerns as a mother during her third pregnancy were not being reassured by her doctors.

I remember one night in particular when her illness had reached a point of complete terror. My sister and I heard my dad coming upstairs.  We thought that we were making too much noise and he was coming upstairs to get onto us, but he was coming to get us so up so that he could take my mom to the hospital. We came downstairs with him and sat in their room. I saw my mom on her knees in the bathroom. She could barely stand up. She was in so much pain.

She was finally admitted to the hospital on January 8 and told that her third child would be born that night, six weeks before her due date.  I remember sitting in my mom's hospital room with our next door neighbors, who were like grandparents to us, and my actual grandparents, who all kept telling me that it was going to be OK. What was going to be OK? What was wrong? Don't women have babies everyday?

Then, my dad walked in, and this is probably my most vivid memory because it was the moment I realized that nothing about this delivery was normal. My dad, to me, was always this large man. I don't mean large in that he was fat, but he was just a tall, strong man. At 8, I thought he was surely tall and strong enough to play in the NBA. He walked in in scrubs. My dad is an insurance guy so seeing him in scrubs was confusing enough as it was, and then I saw tears in his eyes. This was the first time I had ever seen my hulk of a father shed a tear. And it was the only time I would see him cry until his own father passed away years later.

My mom and sister recovered because both were fighters, and, if I'm being truthful, both were also abundantly blessed and lucky to have made it through. I wasn't able to see my sister for a long time. I knew she existed, but she wasn't living with us. I would send my mom and dad in with a disposable camera so they could take pictures of my new sister and so that I could see what she looked like.

Once she was born, and we were finally out of the woods, I could not have been more excited to have a baby sister - a complete 180 degree change of mind from where I was months before when I found out there was going to be addition to our family. After almost a month, that little fighter, weighing in at only about four pounds came home right before my 9th birthday. And what a celebration that was! We finally had every member of our family home!

Friends brought meals and snack items to my family, nurses would bring me coloring books to the waiting room, people went out of their way to provide for my family. Support. That is the meaning of it all. I want the families there now or in the future, who may find themselves far far away from relatives, or in a financial crisis, or an emotional one to have the support they need to get them through. It takes so much more than medical care and assistance to get an entire family to weather that kind of storm.

Our Sweet Caroline - only a few days old - being held up by my mother's hand

Many years later - one of my favorite pictures of the three of us!

Bonnets and Blankets Drive

Bonnets, Blankets and Onesies...oh my!! The next two days are focused on collecting clothing for babies in the NICU. Like I have said in posts before, many of the families who will benefit from these donations had no idea that they would be spending time in the NICU, there were no signs that anything was wrong, but now they have a sick baby to care for physically, emotionally and financially. Its the simple things that will help them get through this and allow them to focus on what is important: the recovery of their newborn. 

If you have children who have outgrown their baby clothes, and you don't know what to do with them, please consider donating them to the babies in the NICU. It is finally Spring after all, so if you are in "Spring Cleaning" mode like I am then maybe you have items that you would like to see donated instead of thrown away. They can take baby clothes sizes 0-3 mos. and 3-6 mos., or if you have had a preemie and have those preemie clothes, those are most certainly taken as well. 

Preemie Diaper Day

The next two days the item being collected are preemie diapers. These will be given to the parents as they finally leave the hospital with their newborn and go home to start their lives. While diapers may not be the most exciting item, they are certainly at the top of most "newborn necessities" lists!

It is difficult to put ourselves in the situation that so many parents find themselves in, but I hope that through reading about the March of Dimes NICU Family Support Program at UAB those situations and circumstances are awakening the sense of need that this program and the families have each day. I often have put myself in the position of the parents in the NICU and realize that the support of my family and friends would be what I would need to get myself through that. However, as mentioned previously in this blog, many families are far from home with few, if any, loved ones close by to provide the simple things...like diapers.

If you feel lead to donate, please contact me using my contact information located on this flyer.

Scrapbooking Supplies Day

I hope everyone is staying dry over these past few rainy days, but you know what they say...April Showers bring May flowers! So we must have a lot to look forward to in May based on the weather we have had over the past couple of days.

Today is our Scrapbooking Supplies Day. Some may say that items such as scrapbooking supplies are arbitrary to a family who is faced with a sick baby, that there are more important things to worry about when you are in the NICU day in and day out, and to them I say...you might be right.

However, as I look at the scrapbook that my mother made for me and my two younger sisters with such detail and precision, I think to myself - isn't that what every mother wishes she could be doing instead of holding their precious baby's fingers through the hole of an incubator? Of course it is. My scrapbook has every breath documented, every lost curl from my head is glued on the page and all of my important milestones covered with glitter and glue.

The milestones the babies in the NICU experience may be different, but from the day they are born each parent celebrates them with the same excitement! The March of Dimes NICU Family Support Program at UAB offers scrapbooking opportunities to those parents as a way to immortalize each memory and each accomplishment that their newborn achieves. A scrapbooking hobby is not cheap though, so today I am collecting supplies so that the mothers and fathers can continue to archive each day and each precious memory!

If you feel lead to donate, please contact me using the contact information located on the flyer below.

 

Snack Food Drive

If I am feeling hungry, all I have to do is go to my pantry to grab a snack. That is something that I feel we are constantly taking for granted; the convenience of having everything we need within our home. But what if you were not at home? What if, because of your child's health, you were forced to live somewhere far from home, family and every convenience that you had grown accustomed to?

Every Wednesday in the month of April I will be collecting snack foods, and other nonperishable food items, to give to families in the NICU.  These snack foods can be packs of crackers, fruit snacks, nutri-grain bars, etc. I will also be collecting items like the Cup O Noodles and other microwavable food items. Because there is a microwave on the  NICU floor, parents can heat up meals or other food items. There are no plates or bowls, so that is why items like the Cup O Noodles are the best because it requires little else.

I am striving to make each family's stay in the NICU as comfortable as it can be. Those little conveniences are so easy to take for granted and so hard to live without! If you feel lead to donate, please contact me with the contact information located on the flyer below.

Hygiene Supplies Drive

For the past two days, I have been collecting hygiene supplies for the families that are in the NICU.  The items that seem to be the most needed and useful by the families are items like: toothpaste, toothbrushes, shampoo, lotion, razors, shaving cream, combs and brushes, deodorant and soap/body wash.  While we take these items for granted when we get ready in the morning, so many families who were not planning on an extended stay have to go without them.

These items will be appreciated throughout the month of April not just these first two days. If you feel lead to give, please contact me using my contact information located on the flyer below.

April Showers 2013

I am so excited about April Showers this year!! As many of you know, this is April Showers' second year.  However, this is the first year that all proceeds from this month-long drive will benefit the March of Dimes and the March of Dimes NICU Family Support Program.

The March of Dimes is an organization that is near and dear to my heart and the hearts of my family because of our sweet Caroline who was born 14 years ago weighing only 2.5 pounds and 6 weeks early. My mom developed toxemia while she was pregnant with Caroline for some unknown reason. The March of Dimes is working everyday to put an end to premature births and birth defects, and for that the Bagwells are eternally grateful for an organization like this one.

We were among the luckiest of the families because both Caroline and my mom recovered and are doing wonderfully today, but everyday so many families find themselves in a place of complete desperation because their baby will not be able to come home yet.

The NICU Family Support Program was designed to provide personal support and encouragement to the families in the hospital. This month, every donated item will be sent to the NICU Family Support Program at UAB. Also, this month I will be providing, via this blog, testimonials from families currently at UAB and those families who have been in the NICU.  Whether it is a one-day stay in the NICU or many months, each experience is just as terrifying and hits each family just as hard.

It is easy to donate items or dollar amounts and not truly be able to see who or what it is benefitting. I am hoping to provide that visual with each testimony. This is not to say that every donated item will go directly to the family that is mentioned in this blog, but my hope is that it will give a clearer picture of the families we are supporting this month.

Someone may look at this calendar and not understand why such simple, everyday items are being requested. However, these items are for families, parents and siblings in the NICU who might be far from home; families who were not planning on an extended stay in the hospital; or families who may not be able to get away to the local convenient store for fear of leaving their child in the NICU. These items are to help ease a family's mind, bring them comfort or joy, or just to make each day a bit easier.

Below is the calendar for the month of April.